Curiosity Killed the Mad Scientist
by ice flow
Summary: Inui found to his dismay, that he had data missing. Warnings: Attempted crack, featuring stalker!Seigaku, Fuji being Fuji, and chaos from various schools


**Title**: Curiosity Killed the Mad Scientist  
**Author**: ice  
**Genre**: General, Humor  
**Rating**: PG-13  
**Pairings**: AtoJi  
**Warnings**: Attempted Crack. Failed.  
**Summary**: Inui found to his dismay, that he had data _missing_.  


* * *

  
**Disclaimer**: ...if only life was so simple. I can only dream about creating Atobe and Jirou and Hyoutei and PoT in general. I'd be one rich girl if I could. I'd also see if I could go meet Kazuki-sama. ^_^

* * *

It was after Nationals, and they had won. It was a peaceful day, there was no practice--Tezuka had to take care of an errand at home, and Inui could create all the toxic poi--ahem, energizing juices he wanted. That was, until he flipped through one of his journals, or more specifically, the one on Hyoutei, and found to his dismay, that he had information almost fully missing from one of the players. Sure, it did not matter anymore since Seigaku would not be playing Hyoutei in any future tournaments for this year, but it still rubbed him the wrong way that he had data _missing_.

He walked down the street pondering how he was going to go to Hyoutei in time to catch the elusive player and observe him playing--especially when all the times he'd snuck into Hyoutei, he'd seen the boy _sleeping _through the entire practice--when he saw said blond jogging down the street on the other side of the road, going in the opposite direction. There was his chance! The boy was awake. Perhaps he was training?

He quickly crossed the road and followed the blond as inconspicuously as possible. Hmm...impatiently taps foot while waiting for crosswalk light to turn. Still the same height. Has not grown. Wears...he continued to scribble, not noticing when a particular red-head had shown up next to him until said red-head called out.

"Hoi hoi! Inui, what're you doing?" Kikumaru rested an arm on Inui's shoulder as he peered at the notebook. Startled, Inui snapped the booklet shut and adjusted his glasses.

"Collecting data, of course."

Kikumaru gave him a skeptical look. "Data on who? Besides, Nationals are over already. What other data is there?"

Inui considered it for a bit before deciding to tell the red-head. Perhaps Kikumaru could help him observe. "My data on Akutagawa Jirou is surprisingly the most incomplete set of data out of all the players in this region."

Kikumaru blinked. "Seriously?"

Inui coughed. "Yes." He looked up in time to see the light change and said blond continuing his jog. "Let's go." He followed the boy, leaving Kikumaru to stand there stunned for a second before moving to catch up.

"How do you know he's not just training?" Kikumaru huffed over three miles later.

"I do not believe he is. If I am correct, we are close to Rikkaidai right now."

"Ehhh?? Why would he come here?"

As they caught up to the blond and hid behind a bush, they saw the blond boy walking into Rikkai, heading straight for the tennis courts. It seemed the Rikkai team were still holding practice at this time of the day. Actually, wouldn't Hyoutei also have practice at this time...? Inui pondered as he jotted that particular detail down.

_Skips practice with apparent buchou permission. _

The two Seigaku players continued to watch the Hyoutei boy as he stared wide-eyed through the fence at the tennis courts...at least, until Sanada came and picked him up by the back of his shirt. Inui blinked.

_Light...VERY light. _

Despite Sanada's abilities, there was no way a person would just pick up another with just one hand unless said person was a power-hitter. And Sanada did NOT specialize in heavy-power.

"Hyoutei. What are you doing here." Sanada growled at the blond.

"Hmm? Oh, hi! I was watching Marui-kun!" Jirou grinned.

_Not afraid of scary people, check.  
_  
"Rikkai is at PRACTICE. Do not assume you can just walk in and observe us." Sanada glared at the boy.

Jirou frowned slightly. "It's not like I'm doing any harm. I was just watching Marui-kun."

"That-"

"Genichirou." They all looked over to see Yukimura approaching the two. "Akutagawa-kun." He nodded.

"Hi!" Jirou gave a small wave.

"Put him down please."

"But-" Sanada tried to protest.

"Now, please."

Sanada gave up and let the boy go. Yukimura turned to Jirou. "You say you were watching Marui-kun, correct?"

"Hai~!"

"Hmm..." Yukimura mused. "We ARE at practice right now, so we can't have anyone watching. Why don't you come back later? Practice will end at six tonight. If you're still interested, you can come back then."

Still interested? Inui thought that was a little suspicious. Why would the blond not be interested in meeting his idol? Especially if he jogged all that way just to come here. He completely missed the wink and tilt of the head Yukimura gave Jirou.

"Aww...okay. See you later then!" Jirou looked disappointed for a few seconds before bouncing back. Inui wondered if the boy ever got sad. Losing 1-6 to Fuji certainly didn't.

As the boy left Rikkai, the Inui and Kikumaru once again followed silently.

"Hmm...where should I go..." Jirou seemed to be pondering his next destination. "Ohhh..let's try the street courts!" He cheered before he ran off again.

Inui and Kikumaru wondered just how much energy the boy had. He didn't seem like he'd be running out anytime soon. He was still as active and hyper as he was at the beginning. They were so preoccupied in following the blond, they ran past Momoshiro without realizing it.

"O-oi!" Momo gave chase. "What are you guys doing?" He asked when he caught up.

"Following that guy!" Kikumaru pointed.

Momo squinted. "Isn't that one of the Hyoutei players?"

"Yes. I require more data on him. My record of him is strangely incomplete." Inui said.

"So you guys are just following him then?" Momo asked.

"Yeah! C'mon Momo." Kikumaru hooked an arm around Momoshiro's neck and dragged him along.

"Okay, okay! I'm following!"

When they got to the park, they frantically looked around for the blond. Jirou had seemingly disappeared.

"...Tezuka's all healed, isn't he. I mean, he played against Kabaji. That was sugoi!"

Their ears perked at the ranting. They crept closer to the source of the voice until they saw who it was. Jirou had somehow cornered Echizen and was now ranting to the boy.

Ryoma stared at the Hyoutei senior as he continued to talk and talk. "Oh! I know! Let's go for ice cream! My treat!" Ryoma made no noise as the other boy suddenly dragged him off the courts and out of the park. He was too shocked at the sudden change in topic to respond.

Eventually, Jirou led him to a fancy dessert shop. He stared at the outside of the shop. It was very nicely decorated, but who the hell would open a shop that sold fancy DESSERTS of all things?

"C'mon!" Ryoma inwardly sighed as the blond grabbed his arm and dragged him into the store. **That **was why these shops existed.

"What should we get, what should be get..." Jirou babbled to himself. "Oh! Strawberry Ice Cream Tart!" He ordered before turning to Echizen. "What do you want? Pick, pick!" He encouraged.

Giving in--it was free, afterall--Ryoma scanned the menu. "That one." He randomly picked.

"Okay! Add a Chocolate Parfait to that order please!" When both orders were served, Jirou quickly pulled Ryoma to one of the booths before starting to eat and chatting at Ryoma, as the younger boy just nodded his head every now and then as he ate his sugary dessert.

"Echizen?" Ryoma started and looked up to see Fuji Syuusuke observing him. His brother Yuuta and St. Rudolph's manager Mizuki were both present also.

"Fuji-senpai." He greeted.

"Waaah!! Fuji-kun!" Jirou had turned his attention onto Fuji instead. "What are you doing here? Getting a snack? Taking a break?" His happy smile turned a bit mischievous. "On a date?"

"Hmm? What makes you say that?"

Jirou shrugged. "Well, you're always saying that you're on a date whenever Yuuta-kun's around." He pointed at Yuuta as the boy blushed and turned slightly red, happy that someone remembered his name.

"I see." Fuji smiled. "Jaa, want to join us then? You too, Echizen."

Ryoma froze at where he was attempting to sneak off, saying a quick "No thanks," before running off, not wanting to stay around the weird senpai anymore. He wondered if all the seniors at the schools were weird. He decided to head home, but unfortunately for him, a hand grabbed him and dragged him into the bushes.

He shook his head to orient himself again and saw three of his senpai hiding behind said bush. Yeah, senpai-tachi were all weird.

"Nya, Ochibi. What're they saying?"

Ryoma shrugged. "Something about a date with Fuji-senpai." He said as he started to walk off again. Hands grabbed his shirt and dragged him back.

"Nani?!"

"Whoa, you're not going anywhere until you explain!"

"Ii data."

"Don't know. I didn't stick around long enough to find out what they were all doing." Ryoma said.

"Nya, do you think that Hyoutei kid dragged Ryoma out to keep him company just until Fujiko came along?"

"Maybe. Or maybe they're all going on a double date?"

"Hmm..." They stared as Inui dialed a number on his phone. "Kawamura. We're at that new dessert shop that just opened five blocks away. Fuji appears to be going on a date with three different men. Want to know?" The dial-tone rang before he even finished his sentence. He glanced at the phone before putting it away. "90% chance Kawamura will show up in 3....2.....1."

He reached out a hand to grab the blur that was about to speed by. The power-hitter panted as he sat down on the ground. "Wha-what's going on?"

Inui pointed at the shop where Fuji, Yuuta, Mizuki, and Jirou were visible. "See for yourself."

"We think they might be on a double date." Kikumaru added.

Kawamura sighed in relief. "What was Inui going on about then?"

"That was just to get you here as soon as possible before they leave."

"There they go!" Momoshiro whispered as the group of four began exiting the shop.

In the meanwhile, said group of four had indeed agreed to go on a 'double-date.' Fuji had offered Mituli to Jirou, but Jirou had declined, saying that Mizuki-san was too weird, to which Mizuki had shouted _'You have **Atobe **as a captain and you think **I'm** weird?!' _

"Yes." Came the flat response from the blond.

"Hmm...you can have Yuuta, then!" Fuji exclaimed as he shoved his brother at Jirou. "I'll be with Mitani-kun for today. Mikani-kun must be kept away from my dear Yuuta at all times."

"Aniki!"

"Be good for Jirou-kun, Yuuta."

Yuuta's jaw dropped as his aniki pretty much gave him away to another person.

"Demo..." Jirou frowned. "It's only for today, right?"

"Yes. I'd like Yuuta back in a few hours."

Jirou grinned. "Okay!" He glomped onto Yuuta's arm and started dragged him out of the shop. "Ne, ne! Where should we go?"

"According to my information, there is a small festival-like carnival being held approximately five miles from here." Mizuki said. "Although why they have such a thing so close to Tanabata, I don't understand." He muttered to himself.

"Okay, let's go there then!" Jirou bounced.

Fuji sighed. "They're growing up so fast." He said, earning himself an incredulous stare from Mizuki. Mizuki wasn't sure he wanted Fuji to acknowledge him anymore. The boy was **_strange_**.

"Hmm..." As Fuji left the shop, however, his eye caught on the minute rustle of the bush nearby. He chuckled to himself. It appeared they had a few stalkers. Oh well, all the more fun. Just then, Jirou turned back around and winked at him, tilting his head to the side.

Fuji blinked in surprise. So that boy wasn't as clueless and naive as he appeared. This was certainly going to be interesting. He laughed to himself as the St. Rudolph manager began to scoot away from him a little.

"Hmm...ii data. Akutagawa appears to be dating Yuuta, who Fuji has always been overprotective of. However, it appears Fuji does not mind Akutagawa being close to said brother."

"I don't want to know what Fujiko's thinking...nya."

"Fuji-senpai is scary." Momo shivered.

"They should be far enough from us by now." Inui said as he got up and followed, the rest of the group also following.

After a while of following the four, Kikumaru noticed something. "Hey, you guys...isn't that Shitenhouji?" He pointed across the street at the group that was also heading in the same direction.

Inui blinked. "I...believe so." Then it appeared as if Shitenhouji had noticed them, considering the first year on their team were pointing over at them.

"HEY, HEY!! SE-MMPH!!" Shiraishi covered the boy's mouth. "Stop shouting." He scolded.

The five from Seigaku realized that their cover would be blown if they allowed the boy to continue talking, and so, quickly crossed the street. "What are you doing here?" Inui asked.

Shiraishi shrugged. "Got an invitation in the mail to the Tanabata Festival tomorrow night. We were sent train tickets and everything. Figured we might as well come."

Inui stared. "I...see." He looked back down at his data.

"Inui-senpai. We're going to lose them." Ryoma pointed out. They all looked over to see that indeed, the four they had been following were almost completely lost in the crowd.

"Damnit!" Momo cursed. "Let's go!"

"Hoi hoi!"

"Wait!"

Inui began running even as he muttered to himself about his data.

Shitenhouji blinked at the four. "What's up with them?" Oshitari Kenya asked the last member left behind.

Ryoma shrugged. "Stalking." He deadpanned before follow his senpai.

**_"Stalking?!" _**

Shitenhouji looked at each other for a few moments before concluding, "Kantou is WEIRD."

* * *

-------------------

"Ohh! Hey, let's stop here!" The blond Hyoutei player led the way into another random store. Yuuta wondered what had possessed his brother to actually allow him to 'date' someone else. It was unusual, to say the least. Aniki would always attempt to drive him insane with his comments, and here he was, perfectly fine with just watching him and Jirou-san.

Then again, maybe it just came from the fact that his aniki knew that Jirou-san would do anything his aniki asked of the boy. It was a little unnerving at times, to see the boy fanboying over people. He looked over at the hyper blond consideringly...but he was really cute. He blushed at his train of thought. Oh no, he was NOT going to go there. He heard a familiar chuckle from nearby.

"Don't get too attached, Yuuta. You only have the next few hours after all." Fuji smiled mischievously at him. He stared at his brother, confused. He didn't understand how his brother's mind worked.

"Okay, let's go!" The hyperactive blond dragged them out of the store and towards their destination once again.

Here they go again.

---------------------------------------------------------

Four hours later, they had finally arrived at their destination. They had taken quite a few stops, but they had finally arrived.

"This is a small festival?" Fuji raised an eyebrow at Mizuki. Yuuta mentally agreed with his brother. It seemed more like a festival that was barely beginning to be set up, and was going to continue being set up for sometime yet. Sure, there were shops open at one end, but there were still rows upon rows of untented booths. He looked around the place, but froze when the glint of glasses flashed in the corner of his eye.

"Aniki....is your data-man...following us...?"

Fuji smiled. "Yes. Just ignore him." Yuuta mentally groaned. If Seigaku was this weird, then he was damn glad he left last year.

"Marui-kun!" They both looked up as a blond blur sped over the Rikkai red-head.

Marui blinked at the sudden appearance of his fan. "Eh? What're you doing here?"

"I'm on a date with Yuuta-kun for now."

"Wait, what? But-"

"Fuji-kun says it's okay for these few hours, then I have to give him back, but that's okay, I'm sure Fuji-kun loves Yuuta-kun very much." Jirou continued babbling. "Oh yeah, are you here for the festival? Ne, ne, ne?" He looked at the red-head with wide-eyes.

"Jirou-kun, let him speak." Fuji said to the blond lightly.

"Oh yeah!" Marui's bubble popped. "Shouldn't you be calling Atobe by now? Hyoutei's been going crazy looking for you. Buchou sent us out to help look while we wander around. They told us you should be around here, and told us to tell you that you needed to call your team back when we find you."

"Eh?" Jirou blinked. Then he rummaged through his pockets for his phone.

43 missed calls.

"Oops." Jirou smiled sheepishly. He pressed a few button, using the speed-dial. "Hi, I-"

_"Where the hell are you?! Ore-sama told you that you could go wander around for a few hours, not disappear completely!!" _

Jirou held the phone away from his ear. "Eheheh...I left the phone on silent..."

* * *

"I'm at the ramen stand at the end of the booths." He tried to placate his captain.  
_  
"Stay there." Click. _

Jirou turned around to face the other four boys. "I had a fun time today. Thanks! I have to go now, though."

"It's fine, Jirou-kun." Fuji smiled at the blond.

Jirou smiled back mischieviously. "Ne...are your teammates still there?" Jirou called loudly, watching in amusement as half of the Seigaku team fell out into a pile from behind a rock.

"You know, you guys suck at sneaking around." Jirou told them, amused.

"Nya?! You knew we were following you this entire time?" Kikumaru asked in disbelief.

"Eh? Me? I thought you were following Fuji-kun." Jirou blinked.

"Ii data. Observant, but clueless."

Jirou turned to Yuuta. "Ne, Yuuta-kun. Thanks for letting me drag you around today." He grinned.

"....definitely clueless." Inui muttered.

Jirou frowned and turned back around. "What are you talking about?" He demanded. He never received his answer, however, being interrupted by his captain's voice.

"Jirou! Have you been spending your time around these..._commoners _the entire day?"

"Yeah. They were fun though!" Jirou beamed.

"I...see..." Atobe narrowed his eyes at one particular person. Yuuta.

The boy, sensing the glare, stood up straight and attempted to stare back.

"Ne, ne! Atobe, is dinner ready yet?" Jirou tugged on Atobe's sleeve, breaking the glaring match.

"Dinner has been ready and waiting to be served for the past hour. You were supposed to pick up when Ore-sama called."

"I'm sorry, Keigo..." Jirou pouted.

Atobe sighed. "Let's go." He turned and ignored the other tennis players, possessively hooking an arm around Jirou's waist and leading him away.

They all stared at the backs of the two Hyoutei members, with the exception of Fuji, who only giggled.

"Is that..."

"Are they..."  
_  
"...Keigo...?!?!??!" _

"......Akutagawa's...."

Inui adjusted his glasses as he mused. "Perhaps that's why he gets away with so much..." He muttered to himself.

"Nya! Fujiko, Did you see that?" Kikumaru asked Fuji, eyes-wide.

"Yes. That's why I told you not to get too attached, Yuuta." Fuji said to his brother.

"Aniki! I did not!"

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